Sunday, October 27, 2013
My Head Start
Taking into account the advantages that I myself had in regard to advancing my place in the world is something that I have attempted to do my whole life. From a young age my parents strove to instill a sense of humility and awareness within me, especially in regard to the way I see myself. Being deeply involved in education themselves, they were very aware of the many faults and prejudices that are instilled with the institution. They also never took their own successes for granted, knowing that much of what they have accomplished is attributed to the opportunities their parents, skin color, and economic standing had given them. It is easy to forget these details, and easier still to neglect them, whether through our ignorance or our egos, we are very reluctant to give credit to the many extrinsic factors that spurred us to our achievements. Personally, I have done my best to keep track of them, though I admit to disliking and even neglected the process on several occasions as it can rob oneself of justifiable pride. Some of the most notable advantages that I have had in life include... Parents with phd's from Ivy League universities who work in education. Individually their salaries exceed the median household income in America. I was enrolled in private school from 1st through 12th grade, encouraged to read, write, and pushed to practice. They paid for tutors, test practice, drove me to and from extra curricular activities, and invested time and money in my athletic potential. They helped me with the college admissions process, took days off of work to visit colleges with me all over the country, and of course pay my tuition... oh yea, and they also gave me white skin which has its benefits. This list is far from complete, and yet the details listed already exceed those possessed by the majority of Americans, regardless of skin color. These are things that I do my best to never take for granted, and while I still feel pride for the accomplishments I have had in life, I never assume to be deserving of all the credit. Rather than being a source of guilt, these realities have to a great extent steered my direction in life. They have given me a glimpse of why inequality persists from one generation to the next, and have inspired me to allocate my own knowledge, handwork, money, and ability into leveling the playing field for us all.
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I too have struggled with the realization that so much of my accomplishes and ambitions are dependent upon and influenced by the large advantages I've had in life simply by merit of my white skin. I guess an aspect of white privilege is believing that our academic accomplishments and our positions in clubs and sports are a reflection of ourselves and, perhaps, the way our parents raised us. But sometimes we miss the larger issue at hand, like the neighborhood we live in, our familial assets, the unequal education system, the opportunity to attend college, the financial ability to pursue certain activities. It's hard for that to sit right with me, but I know I can't shed my privilege. I have to utilize my position in a way to partner with and help others who are not at the same starting point as me, which is what I think you want to do as well.
ReplyDeleteThis was one of the hardest questions for me to think about after reading like White Like Me: What should I do about my white privilege? How should I look at it?
ReplyDeleteI, like Ian, don't think feeling guilty is a good way to look at it --- both for ourselves and the attempt to end privilege. My experience with guilt usually leads me to become motionless and fixated on the past. It also causes me to focus on ME; the problem becomes what I did wrong, not on the person or people that are affected by my actions.
At the same time, I can't help but feel guilty. I can't help but feel like I don't deserve the things I have --- a liberal arts education, books, a laptop, the ability to read, write, and travel. I am constantly looking for a way to justify my reasons for having the things and experiences I have. I tell myself, "I'm going to use my education to help people".
I realize that these justifications are just ways in which I'm trying to, in Leah's words, "shed my privilege". They are ways for me to say, "yeah, I have privilege, but..." I'm not so sure these are effective ways of addressing privilege. Like I said before, it is clear that the focus here is placed on ME --- on sort of "getting my hands clean" of privilege.
I still don't quite know what to do about my privilege but I don't think guilt and trying to justify it is the best way to go about it.